#131: Ferdinand Magellan (JC-Verse Edition)

Time for another installment from the brightly-colored haven of craziness known as my friend Sophie's mind. Ladies and gents, Ferdinand Magellan! I know. Ol' Ferdinand already existed. But this is the JC-Verse version, and you have to know by now that whatever is in the JC-Verse is 193 times weirder than the same thing in our universe. Real math, people. This Magellan didn't just stop at the seas of Earth, no. He went all-out. That's right. He was an inter-dimensional traveler. After getting tossed into the infinite BEYOND... BEYOND... BEYOND, the cartoonishly flamboyant explorer of the sea took off with his crew and began his circumnavigation of the universe, meeting several E.T.s, including #127: Ozbald of Wuzzlemoo. His current whereabouts is unknown, but my guess is chilling like a villain with Captain Jack Sparrow. A friendship made in Heaven.

HAPPY B-DAY, PAMPA!

Today is the 83rd anniversary of the day the world got just that more awesome. That's right, today is my Pampa's birthday and I wanted to do something special for it. So, without further ado, I give you Pampafest.

BAD-OFF CAMPAIGN COMMERCIAL: THE IMPOSSIBLE

Looks like the Bad-Off poll just got real.

"EGOEY"

Here's an "Egoey" straight from Doug's Twitter. I tried to tell the furry fellow it's called a selfie, but he wouldn't budge. Something about "not submitting to the will of the youngins."

#130: Mixberry

Finally! Toy Story 4 is coming to theaters in summer 2017!!! Huh, looks like the Muppets were more-or-less right. Okay, after a few months of Marvel-esque creations, I've decided to return to my roots with an old-fashioned comedic post. Here's my new character: Mixberry! The JC-Verse is home to a large populous of talking food. I would give quite the reason, but telling the tale of a celestially-powered cook feels like more of a Saturday thing. But while some of these living meals find themselves in the Food Wars Universe or telling lively religious tales on television, others find themselves with a different purpose: bustin' out some dope tunes. Enter Mixberry. First growing onto the scene in 1994 with his hit, "Sweet-n-Sour (Fight the Power)," this bite-sized beatmaster has dominated the charts with songs such as "Ice Ice Berry" and ''Fruit! They're It Is." (I dedicate this post to my 1990s time-capsule of a cousin Jared. A pure example of the fact that growing up is only an option. Props, dawg!)

#129: Jillajones Skeltie

For all of you who are on Twitter, I would like to point that character #100, Doug, has just recently begun his account. If you could check it out and follow the guy, that would be ducky. Okay, sorry I'm posting my Halloween character the day after, but better late than never. Ladies and gentlemen, Jillajones Skeltie! Down in the hoodoo voodoo hodgepodge that is New Orleans, people at Halloween time come with the thoughts of big, scary ghouls flying around in their heads. Pretty pathetic, really, considering they're all freaked out over creatures that look like this heel-clicking fellow below. Living in Spaggleworth Manner with the rest of his apparition pals (including the oh-so-familiar Ghoulman), Skeltie is the large group's leader and a happy little snappy-dressed one at that. Fun fact: in our universe, Jillajones is a stuffed toy I got in a claw machine when I was a mere Jakeling. I just looked at the guy when I got him and thought, "I will name him Jillajones Skeltie!" Even I wonder how that name came about in my head. I was/am a strange child.

#128: Anticape

Sorry, guys! I could not apologize enough. I did not know about International Animation Day until it was over, but I will try to make up for it with some Walt. "Animation can explain whatever the mind of man can conceive" -Walt Disney. Or in this case, the mind of 12-year-old. Speaking of, here's my new character: Anticape! I've told you of the 2014 Super Little Cape, I told you of the 1980s Super Little Cape, now I tell you the unfortunate tale of Rider Zain, the 1960s Super Little Cape. I know the '60s is usually the decade of which we try to forget, but this is important. Once simply an orphan from Pizeezle, California, Zain came upon the mystic cape when it shot through his window and clonked him in the thinker. Once he came back to consciousness, he accepted the job. But unfortunately, the cape can make you a superhero, but it can't make you a good guy. After using his powers to severely hurt a group of robbers, he was stripped of his cape and went kookoo-bananas. Now using a duplicate cape called Darkgarment, he has declared war on all future Super Little Capes and has become the raging fiend Anticape! Phew! Great Master Yoda's ghost, that was a mouthful. Well, post-full.  

BAD-OFF: ROUND IV

Congrats to the elastic ol' bean, the Impossible, for winning the latest BAD-OFF! Now, he takes on Griefer: 8-bit baddy and foe of SkyStar. All of us who've sat for millennia attempting and failing to win the boss battle on a video game feel ya, Impossible. We feel ya.

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